Barack the Vote
by Natasha Chart, Thu Oct 30, 2008 at 02:26:25 AM EDT
... please, do it for Pam. As you can see in the video to your right, this poor, poor woman, Pam Geller, is in dire need of better prescription coverage. Electing Barack Obama to the presidency will be a great stride towards the goal of getting it for her.
Now you might say, "But Natasha, that woman is so over-the-top guano, if she didn't exist, she'd have to be invented. She's hilarious. Fix her problems, and the nice bloggers at Sadly, No will have to find new, perhaps even more toxic, sources of guano to mock for our eventual amusement."
But look, we should not be selfish. If Pam were your sister, daughter, or even friend, I'm sure you'd want to see her get help. Well, as Obama reminded us all the way back in 2004, we are our sisters' keepers. Even if they aren't our sisters. Or something like that.
Pam's plight doesn't move you? Then do it for Dana. Congressman Dana Rohrabacher (R-CA), that is. Dana is a 61 year old man who's been reduced to being the "biggest blithering idiot" in Congress. You may not know this, and I wouldn't want to alarm you, but there is some stiff damn competition for that title. Even when you've gotten to the point where you're reduced, as he is in the video to your left, to babbling about "dinosaur flatulence" in the face of overwhelming scientific evidence that you're dead wrong.
I mean, that might not even be in the all-time top 10 dumbest things said by a congresscritter.
Dana would retire, so he could save some of his dignity, but with his party in control of any of the levers of power in Washington, DC, that's a precarious thing to do. Republicans are just no good for retirement security. So poor Dana approaches his twilight years forced to continue working long past time when the skills he was trained in (showboating, crossdressing) are really good fits for his job. Instead of being able to cheer the Russian invasion of Georgia in the comfort of his jammies at home, Dana had to do so in a suit in front of the media. So sad.
Won't you please help Dana retire in peace? You can do it today by supporting Debbie Cook, his opponent, and a Way Better Democrat. Debbie will help make sure that all Americans are not only taken care of in retirement, but that there's a decent future for their descendants. Debbie Cook doesn't want any of our seniors to have to worry themselves sick, that's just the kind of stand up person she is.
So for Pam, Dana, and all the other Americans who are hoping that next Tuesday will be a giant stride towards their most cherished dreams, we must Barack this vote. Following are a few places where you can get a hand with that ...
-- The AFL-CIO has produced these state-by-state voting rights fliers that you can distribute in your area if you're worried about disinformation campaigns.
-- A guide to voter suppression in key swing states can tell you what to look out for, or what to warn friends about if they live in a swing state.
-- If you're on Twitter, you can use the #votereport tag to get breaking election news out from your area via mobile text, details at the link.
-- Are wikis more your speed? Check out the voter suppression wiki or the election protection wiki.
-- This has nothing to do with voting rights, but I couldn't resist sharing a George Will column entitled, "Call Him John the Careless". Priceless.
Now are we ready to rumble? Yes. We. Are. Let's do this thing.
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