Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report http://satiricalpolitical.com

Tired of Bill Safire's annual "Office Pool" column in The New York Times? -- the 2007 version of which appeared today. Sick of his not-so-subtle slants to reflect his right-wing wish list? Well, here then, is the only Office Pool you need, the First Annual "Office Satire Pool" for 2007:

1. George Bush will:

(a) stay the course, (b) give in to his urge to surge, (c) cut and run, (d) cut his wrists.

I hope for (d), but fear it'll be (b).

2. Dick Cheney will push for the invasion of:

(a) Iran, (b) Syria, (c) Iraq, all over again, (d) The Democratic-controlled House and Senate.

My pick: All of the above.

3. Osama bin Laden will:

(a) be captured while dining with Pakistan President Musharraf, (b) take over as the lead anchor on Al Jazeera, (c) be awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by Bush, for ensuring W's re-election.

The answer is (a), but you won't hear about it, since Bush needs both Musharraf and bin Laden.

4. Which politician's platform to battle the E. coli threat will be most ridiculed:

(a) Hillary Clinton's centrist-tacking "All meat should be safe, legal and rare," (b) John McCain's "Send in more bacteria," (c) John Kerry's "How do you ask a man to die for a last steak."

Obviously (c), which will be played to death by the Swift Meat Company veterans.

5. Which position will the extreme Right-Wing do a dramatic reversal on:

(a) abortion, (b) tax cuts for the wealthy, (c) global warming, (d) human cloning.

The correct answer is (d) human cloning, which has already occurred, based on the fact that Pat Buchanan appears simultaneously on every cable news station.

CONTINUED at: http://satiricalpolitical.com/?p=491

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Reprinted from The Satirical Political Report http://satiricalpolitical.com

In order to explore ways to neutralize Senator Obama as her biggest rival for the 2008 Democratic Presidential nomination, Hillary Clinton has authorized the formation of "The Barack Study Group."

The bi-partisan Group is also known as the "Rogers Commission," named after its Chairman, Republican hatchetman Ed Rogers. Rogers was deemed to be the most qualified candidate for the position, based on his intimate knowledge of Obama's family history, including his middle name "Hussein."

The Barack Study Group will ultimately recommend whether Hillary should "cut and run" from the campaign, or "stay the course" for the Democratic nomination.

The Rogers Commission could also advocate a middle course, that Hillary begin a "phased redeployment" from the campaign, and jump back in later, in the event that a civil war or sectarian strife breaks out during the Democratic primary season.

CONTINUED at: http://satiricalpolitical.com/?p=444

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My name is Barry Welsh and I am the Democratic Congressional Candidate in Indiana's 6th District.  I am running against Mike Pence.
First, I had an interview this morning with Jason DeParle of the New York Times.

Last night I was honored to be a Co-Keynote Speaker with Baron Hill (IN-09) at the Bartholomew County, Indiana, Jefferson Jackson Dinner.

It was the second time in five days that former Congressman Hill and I have shared a stage.  Baron and I do not agree on all things.  But as was said "We will both stand up to Bush, and you cannot say that about the two Mike's." (Pence and Sodrell)

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"It's not cutting and running, it's getting the war on terror BACK ON TRACK, by securing the victory in Afghanistan, focusing on bin Laden, and getting our troops out from the middle of a civil war. Our presence in Iraq is LOSING the war on terror, not winning it..."http://ralphlopezworld.com/

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